August 12, 2008

Charlie don't surf


While eating at a popular hamburger place, which means you are charged at least three times what the food is actually worth, I overheard an interesting conversation. There were three young people sitting at a table near me that were deep in discussion about how cool charles manson is. I listened as the obvious leader of the group waxed on about how he controlled so many people and bent them to his whim and desire. "He is obviously a genius since he got them all to do his dirty work for him" "Yeah, we should try to write to him so we can find out how he did it and start a family like that".
When I heard that line I choked on a bite of burger and couldn't help but blurt out "Bullshit". I said it a little too loudly and the boys heard me. They started looking at me as if they wanted to be smart asses, but to my surprise the snaky looking guy asked me why I thought that was bullshit. There is no way that my long winded boring talkative self could turn down an invitation to an actual debate. I told them to come over to the table as they were done eating. I never asked their ages, but they were all drinking beer, so I would assume over twenty one.
I began by asking them to tell me what they knew about the guy. What followed was a narration pretty much taken from most of the movie helter skelter, but their ignorance of the man was astounding to some degree. They were not aware that his motivation was to start a race war between whites and blacks. The guy was basically a convict who learned manipulation at the hands of those who literally owned his ass in the different institutions he lived in for most of his life. I told them that there are a few things you learn as you go along, one of them being that most people who become famous are a dime a dozen, they just work hard to get noticed, like bill clinton, they looked at me in a confused manner, so I asked them if they had ever been to a used car lot, they all said no, so I told them to just go stand around in one for a few seconds and they would see what I meant... When they used the point that he had all those women to do his bidding, I reminded them that when they were picked up at different times the first thing the "man" had to do was get them treated for the various diseases they had. Not to mention the livestock they had crawling all over them. I filled them in on how Sadie had told the cops about performing sexual acts on her then two month old son. (I still can't believe they were thinking of letting her out) I also told them about the two girls that ran away to be picked up by cops on a desert highway informing their saviours of how charlie had them go through purification rites by performing oral sex on non human entities. They began looking a little green by this point. They weren't aware that squeaky had tried to kill the president either. "Some group of people to admire, right?" I told them about "getting the fear", charlie's game of having his minions break into homes and just stand there so that fear would make them feel completely alive. Stealing cars, robbing stores, and mugging people was how he started out in life and never changed. I gave them the quote from the book the family which is something to the effect of: while in prison he averages three orgasms a day by either hand, mouth or buttock. The bigger guy looked at the snaky one and said, "the guy is a fag dude". We spent a couple of hours talking about manson and then branched out to other criminals. They actually got ill when I told them about donald gaskins little personality twists. The best reaction was to the nipple eating incident. The one thing that I learned from the discussion we had was that these kids just didn't read at all. The good thing was that they were actually thirsty for knowledge. They were polite, attentive, and interested in what I had to say. They spoke of things I was ignorant of as well, most of it to do with the latest internet goings on and celebrity gossip items. The best part was when we parted company in the parking lot, they were walking away talking about how they had to hurry to the book store to pick up some of the books I had mentioned. Maybe they will learn to actually enjoy reading... But who knows... I better keep up with local events... I may see one of their pictures on the news soon..

4 comments:

The Angry Georgian said...

Such is the case with today's youth and pretty much every topic of discussion. They only know what they've seen on the idiot box. Rarely do you ever find one that's bothered to do any research.

The Angry Georgian said...

By the way, nice job laying the smackdown on them!

HeartofGoldPlate said...

If they named the book about manson Helter Skelter what would yours be named?

Watch out, there's quite the epidemic of a giant game of telephone lately. Your words will soon be mangled into so many purple monkey dishwashers.

Clay Perry said...

"carousel" boring, repetitive & never goes anywhere...