March 20, 2009

Blogger Profile - Retail clerk with a heart of gold plate

Next in line with a blogger interview is Lauren photographer extraordinaire...

1. So why is Clay Perry your favorite blog to read?

Cley kan right good. Seriously, because I know he's full of stories and knows just how to tell them. I'd let him write my life story.

2. What early life influence do you attribute your current lifestyle to?

I bet it was pop culture even then. Living in the same house as my aunt and grandparents has probably instilled some kind of family values somewhere. I also think being the middle child made me more prone to going with the flow of things and not getting bent out of shape easily.

3. Have you ever had a supernatural experience?

One time I was jerked out of sleep by the sound of one of my cats trying to shimmy open my bedroom door. There was no cat in front of the door or behind it, and as I walked away from the door it pushed open on its own. I think my cat Sparks was trying to let me know it was ok that he got put to sleep. Or it could've been a crazy poltergeist. I'm just banking on it being my cat so I'm not sitting awake all night holding a bible, some holy water, and a blankie.

4. Having worked in retail for many years, what is your worst customer story?

Oh. Where to begin? Should I tell of a stack of cds by a guy named James Morrison artfully displayed on the counter, and the resulting idiocy? One lady said "Isn't James Morrison the lead singer of Morrissey?" Another lady said "is that Jim Morrison from the doors?" After I told her "no, he's someone with the same name" she said he should be sued for false advertising. Then there's lady trying on bras in the lingerie section of Kmart. Or the former CVS employee who had some girl he knew fill a shopping cart with stuff and both were too drunk to think about the parking lot full of cops she pushed the cart full of stolen goods into. None of these are the worst though, I suppose. I remember them fondly. The worst ones are stupid angry people and I've managed to store them away in one scary lump in my subconscious. They're better forgotten.

5. When did you realize that you had a talent for photography and do you intend to pursue it as a career?

I wasn't aware I was good enough for people to pay for. With an infant it's hard to do things. My photography centers around him at the moment. When it's nicer outside, who knows? I can justify sitting outside on a street corner selling prints by saying he needs the fresh air.

6. Given the current state of the geopolitical standing of the globe, how do you think we should best handle the situation with Iran having nuclear capabilities?

Don't ask me. I am the Ostrich. Goo goo ga joo.

7. What one thing about your life would you most like to change?

The answer to this all depends on how I'm feeling when you ask. Sure, there's a lot I'd like to go back and do with the knowledge I have now. I'd spend more time making memories my uncle Steve and my great grandma and my Grandma Hill. These people are ghostly type memories, if anything at all and that saddens me like you wouldn't believe. I'd like to have met Steve earlier, but I think if I had changed things then, I wouldn't have the life I have now. And things are pretty good right now.

8. Favorite movie?

I cannot pick one favorite, but I will tell you to go see Coraline. In 3D if you're able. Anything Neil Gaiman is involved with is pretty good.

9. Being a new mother, how has this influenced your outlook on life?

I try not to sweat the bad small stuff and I try to inhale every solitary second of the good small stuff. I talk more about poop than I ever have in my life. In our little family sleep has become more valuable than cigarettes and handsome boys in prison.

10. Given your life as it stands at this moment, what one word do you feel would best sum it all up?

Crowded, but a nice, warm, fuzzy kind of crowded.


wendy said...

As always, Clay. Brilliant.

Anonymous said...

Lauren should post pictures of her cuteness more often.

HeartofGoldPlate said...

My cuteness is rivaled by one Dexter B. Christiano, and I cannot win that cuteness fight. (Also, that cuteness has dulled some since motherhood.)

I was wondering what picture you were going to choose, Clay.

Also, holy crap, thank you. I'm horrible at taking a damn compliment. :D

Junebug said...

that was a good one Heart of Gold.Clay asked the right questions and you gave good answers.
Having been in retail and working with the public in general,you could write a book.People would read it and say no that's not me.But we know different.